Empowering Your Self When Stressed

Do you sometimes feel as though you cannot go on or as though you just need a break?

Sometimes we can get so caught up in the challenges life presents us that we become stressed physically, emotionally and /or mentally.  It’s at times like this that we can fall into unconscious patterns that disempower us.  They are habitual and have the tendency to feel good in the moment but ultimately let us down.  They are modes of behavior that we developed usually at a very young age and have “refined” over time.  They served us then but are no longer appropriate, helpful or empowering to us now.

There are times when life’s challenges can seem overwhelming and this is when we need to be particularly aware and focused.  Our tendency can be to find ways to “escape” from what is happening.  This is not like taking a short break or a holiday.  Rather what we do is find ways to run away or hide even if just for a little while.  We shut down and become unavailable to life and to our loved ones.

When you make yourself unavailable you are disconnected – shut off from life, love, your Higher Self and Source.  In effect you put yourself aside, out of the flow and disconnect from your Essential Self.

Some of the ways in which we can disconnect and take a “perceived holiday”

  • Become overly dependent asking/hoping someone else will take over for you
  • Isolating yourself or hiding away until the problem disappears or you ‘have the strength to continue the fight”
  • Running away to better things.
  • Numbing out or shutting down
  • Going on autopilot or not engaging in what is happening but still getting things done.
  • Fantasizing or hiding away in a fantasy world pretending the problems you’re facing aren’t there anymore.
  • Slipping into self-absorption (“nobody cares about me), self-pity (“why does this always happen to me?) or self-loathing (“I’m a terrible person because I can’t do this.”)

We can all recognize at least one of these as something we may indulge in at times.  Indulging in this way leaves one feeling helpless and disempowered.  If you recognize yourself in any of these behaviors or that you are slipping into indulging bring yourself out of it and to empowerment.

Notice what you are doing and then decide to be in your Authentic Empowered Self:

  • Asking for help is an empowering way to deal with challenges.  It is not the same as hoping someone will do it for you as you are still very much involved.
  • Recognize that fighting your way through life is exhausting as well as disempowering.  Accept what is occurring.  With acceptance comes clarity and better understanding of how to proceed.
  • Leaving your problems behind or hiding from them does not clear them up.  They’ll be waiting for you or will catch up later.  When you face your challenges squarely you empower yourself.

Yes, everyone needs a little R and R however this does not need to include disconnecting from your Self.  When you do this you’re unavailable.  You cannot be reached by life and you are not extending into life.  You stop living.

Take rests when you need to without indulging in disconnection.  Empower yourself by being with your challenges and doing what is necessary.




About Coach Mary

Mary is a Master Maven Coach (Maven Method™) - one of the deepest reaching and most effective coaching methods at present and is also trained in the Golden Flow™ Method of releasing blocks and flowing with life. She has completed the Mastery of Awareness and Transformation courses with Kris and Kalyn Raphael, certified personal growth guides from the don Miguel Ruiz lineage (world renowned author of The Four Agreements). Mary’s life experience has exposed her to many varied careers, many joys and some deeply painful events. She has released and healed the crushing grief from the death of her son to rediscover the love and joy of life. All have led to an inner awakening and a drive to know her Self deeply and to live life fully, consciously and with Intent. Among her dreams is to guide and support others in their journey through self-awareness and transformation.
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